One’s a Beardy Weirdy,
One’s Explainer Dan,
One’s 80% vegan,
One DJs in a campervan.
One brews his own beer,
One can drink ale no more,
One wears rubber often,
One’s a herbivore.
They both work in E-learning,
The only thing they share.
One’s an ex teacher,
The other, much facial hair.
They bicker frequently,
About things no-one cares about.
Voices raised and pitched,
But never quite a shout.
They love each other really,
They just hide it rather well.
They dream about each other,
Their members begin to swell.
Their secret lust is too powerful,
No longer can they conceal,
The disagreements are fake,
But the love they have is real.
The may snipe at one another,
We know this is just for show.
To disguise their true feelings,
They want know-one else to know.
Because really they like to hold hands,
To skip through fields of wheat,
To talk about Brexit, politics,
And government defeats.
At lunchtimes they can be found,
In the back of a white Vauxhall van,
Caressing each other softly,
Expressing – man on man.
